Michael Dadko, a former Army Captain and Company Commander, has been helping people manage their wealth and plan their futures for over 20 years. As the Senior Vice President at Sailfish Wealth Management for Janney Montgomery Scott, he advises clients daily on how to best preserve and build their wealth for today, tomorrow and for the legacies they want to leave behind. It was this past year, after an experience with Treasure Coast Hospice, that Michael and his family were prompted to look deeper at their own plans and how end-of-life care would factor in to the futures of their loved ones and themselves. Michael describes his experience with Treasure Coast Hospice below in his own words and how it has changed his outlook on hospice care and the role it plays in the overall goals for living your best life.
In June, my mother-in-law, Mary, from Nevada came to live with us. She had been in poor health and was undergoing chemotherapy for breast cancer. Then in September, she was diagnosed with multiple brain lesions. Despite the excellent care of Dr. Nick Iannotti, her life expectancy was less than 6 months.
Mary, my wife Diane, and I made the decision she would stay home with us as long as possible. Based on the recommendation from a friend, we scheduled an appointment with Treasure Coast Hospice (TCH) in early October. Though I’ve had the opportunity to introduce clients to hospice services for legacy and estate planning purposes, I did not truly understand how hospice could help us achieve our goal of keeping Mary with us. Like many others, I assumed that people who were slowly dying always ended up in either a hospital room or a hospice inpatient facility.
During our meeting with Murray Fournie, VP of Philanthropy and Administration for TCH, he laid out the resources available to us. Our goal to keep Mary at home, surrounded by loved ones was not only manageable and possible, but actually the most common place they cared for patients. We discussed a smooth transition from the current home health agency caring for Mary.
TCH helped us understand the physical and psychological phases she would go through. Knowing what to expect gave us so much relief. They also facilitated getting us all the equipment and support we needed: a mechanical bed, shower and toilet accessories, a recliner, pain medication deliveries and frequent nursing visits to check on Mary and our family. Those visits every couple of days were crucial in reassuring my wife that she was doing the right things to give her mother comfort.
Because of these resources, Diane was able to keep her mom with us until she died on December 1st. Mary was never alone; she was surrounded by our family night and day. During the day, we would sit in her room and play games or watch the Hallmark holiday channel.
Even though Mary had stopped eating and could no longer communicate with us, the professionals say that the hearing is the last to go. I believe it must have given Mary great comfort during the scariest part of her life to hear her family close by and to know she was not going to die alone.
We could never have provided that comfort and given Mary those last months surrounded by family without Treasure Coast Hospice and the generous donors who allow this non-profit to continue providing services to our community.
Seeing what hospice care is first hand has allowed me to take a step back and reexamine the options I have available as well as encourage my clients to do the same. We spend a lot of time discussing the health of our finances and ensuring our assets thrive, which is deeply important, but at the same time we should also be discussing what we want our final chapters to look like, our end-of-life care plans, and the legacies we want to leave behind, ensuring others have access to the same resources we do.
I encourage all to have those discussions now, look into your options, and make your plans, so that when it comes time to turn your plan into actions you have the support and comfort you need. And, if you are able, start exploring what you can do to help provide that same comfort to other families in need.
